Taken on a Summer's Night
by SilverDarkwood
Summary: Olivia is taken while on an assignment, and it's up to the SVU to save her. The only problem: they have no idea where she is! Can they find her before it's too late? Rated M for violence, torture, and language. Read and review, let me know what you think
1. Chapter 1

Taken on a Summer's Night

_Summary: Olivia is taken hostage, and it s up to Elliot and the whole of New York's police department to save her. The problem is: they have no idea where she is. Can they get to her in time, or will they be too late?_

Two weeks. Two fucking weeks, and not a single person in this god damn station had seen or heard from her. We've searched everywhere in this godforsaken city, and not a single fucking clue! It wasn't just terrifying, it was frustrating as well. We tried to track her cell phone, but, somehow it was blocked. One of your best detectives goes out on a routine case; one like many she's done before and just disappears into thin air as if by magic. Gone. As though she disappeared into thin air. People just don't disappear in the middle of god damned New York City; it's just not fucking possible. She would have to go somewhere, but where? That is the question that had been driving Elliot and the rest of the Special Victims Unit crazy.

The SVU had even enlisted the help of the Manhattan, Queens, Bronx, and Upper West Side Police departments to find her, but even they couldn't find her. No one could. With each passing day, it got more and more hopeless. Teams of detectives went down town to hang posters and go door-to-door asking if anyone had seen her or had an idea of what could of happened, hoping that, if by a miracle, someone actually did. Not a single god damn shred of information. It seemed like, no matter what they did, nothing worked. They couldn't find her; the squad wanted to know who took her and why. They would give anything to know what happened to their best detective.

After two weeks without a scrap of news, Elliot found himself back at the computer, his fingers running across the keyboard, as if in in a hurry. Each time, he tried a location they had already combed over a dozen times; every time, the same irritating little window would pop up: Unknown Location. Please try a new location. Nothing new had come in since she disappeared. Nothing. Nada. She was really gone, and there were no leads or clues pointing in a promising direction.

A few minutes had passed and Elliot stopped typing and leaned back in his chair, closing his eyes. Something had to open, something had to give way, but where to begin looking? The SVU team came through before, making it through every obstacle that popped up or got in their way. They had a case similar to this one, but it didn't last as long as this one had. Last time, they had clues that led them straight to their missing comrade. This time, they have to go in blind with nothing to point them in the right direction. It seemed with every passing second they weren't out on the street, looking, a second of Liv's life was ticking away.

Her kidnapping had taken a toll on everyone, but especially on Elliot. Everyone on the team was stressed and worried for Olivia's sake. The usually cheerful busy station had gone drastically quiet. Tempers flared and emotions were running high with frustration.

The detectives wouldn't talk with each other, at least, not much anyway. The only words spoken throughout the silent station would be something like "thanks" or "Mhmm." If they needed to communicate a thought, they'd write it down, and pass it along to the person it was meant for.

The air within the station was that of frustration, depression, and worry. Even those who weren't a part of the SVU knew this wasn't the usual air.

As Elliot leaned back in his chair, he hoped that today they would finally find something, that today would be the day they'd bring Liv home...

He turned slightly, as Munch came in, the usual look on his face. Elliot knew what he was going to say before Munch said anything.

"Cragen called every person on this case, and nobody has anything new," he said, sitting down at his desk. "The Bronx PD, the Manhattan PD, the Queens PD, and the Upper East Side SVU are all coming back down to help. We'll find her, Elliot, don't worry," said Munch, smiling a half-assed smile.

"When'll they be here?"

"I think Cragen said noon. Why?"

Elliot stood up. "Go and wait with Fin, then. I need to see the Capitan about something." And, without waiting for a reply, he took off up the spiral staircase towards Don Cragen's office.

Munch watched him for a minute, then headed for the foyer, where Fin was waiting.

"Hey, want some company?" asked Munch as he stepping into the foyer. "I thought Cragen set you to work on something," said Fin, as he leaned against the wall of the foyer. "Elliot sent me out here so I couldn't listen to his conversation with Cragen," said Munch.

"Figures. You were always a fly on the wall when it came to important, private matters," said Fin, staring out the window overlooking the street. "Hey, don't knock it. That's my specialty, being a pain in everyone's ass," said Munch, the half-assed smile back on his face.

* * *

Cragen was sitting at his desk again, his hands flying across the keyboard. He was working on trying to find her cell phone signal, in case by a slim chance, it was turned on again, but with little success. It surprised Cragen a bit that whoever had taken Liv knew she had a tracker on her cell phone, and make sure that they either turned it off or destroyed it somehow. A very interesting fact.

Cragen frowned again, and ran his hand through his hair. He made sure that whoever had Olivia was going to get the beating of a lifetime. As soon as he turned around, tired of looking at a useless computer screen, it changed. He turned around (again), this time, his eyes wide.

* * *

Munch and Fin stood in the foyer for almost two hours, waiting for their new team to arrive.

"Do you think we'll find her? You know, alive and unharmed?" asked Munch after about twenty minutes of silence.

Fin bit his lip for a second, unable to think of what to say. What should he say? He didn't know. No one knew what to say. Everyone in that squad hoped to find her alive and unharmed. They hoped and never gave up on it. But, would they really find her though? Would they be able to make it in time?

"Of course we'll find her. I know for a fact we'll find her." He smiled a half-hearted smile, even though he knew that it'd be a miracle if they did...

* * *

"Guys, I know you've all worked very hard, but I don't know what to say."

"We've searched everywhere, Capitan. Everywhere we look, there's no sign of her." The Manhattan, Queens, Bronx, and Upper West Side detectives were all gathered in the station room, all of them looking up at Cragen and Stabler.

Cragen ran his hands through his hair in frustration. This was getting them nowhere fast; for all they knew, Olivia could be lying somewhere bleeding to death and all they were doing was standing around with their thumbs up their asses. "All we can do for now is wait for Detective Munch to come back with something soon." She probably didn't have a damn thing. They've been searching for weeks now, why would anything new come up now?

"We sent a team from the Manhattan SVU go out into the city again with a heartbeat detector, but they couldn't pick anything up," said Munch, sitting down at his desk.

"She's not dead," snapped Elliot, his grip on the railing tighter (he was standing with his hands on the railing of the spiral staircase that led up to Cragen's office)

"I didn't mean for it to sou-"

"But you sure as hell implied it though! There are millions of places in this fucking city. Did they check all of them?" asked Elliot.

"Only about half of them; they'll let us know if they pick up anything," said Munch.

The mass of detectives stood in silence for a minute, Detective Tutuola being the first to speak. "Who could it have been? Could it be someone that knows who their up against?"

"I'd be willing to think so. If it wasn't, my next bet is someone who's been watching either her or us. Whoever it was knows our technology and our tactics."

"What tactics?" asked Cragen, looking down at Detective Green.

"Can you think of any other way they'd be able to keep her this long without us finding her?" asked Green, his arms folded across his chest.

"I see," said Cragen.

"Ok, so basically, she went off by herself on a case, and never returned?" asked Detective Carter, a detective from the Bronx SVU.

"Yeah, pretty much," said Elliot, his grip tightening even more on the railing.

"I see. Has anyone been released or broken out of jail recently?" asked Green.

Elliot and Cragen thought for a moment. "Um, Manson was released two weeks ago. Warner broke out a couple days ago. Stevens, that crazy Dr. who experimented on women broke out a week ago, we haven't been able to track him down," said Fin from his desk.

"What's up Green? Are you getting at someth-"

But before Cragen could finish his sentence, Detective Beck skidded into the room, a piece of paper in her hand.

"Detective Beck, what the hell happened? Something scare you or what?" asked Cragen.

"N-no sir! I-It's Olivia's signal. I found her sir," she gasped...


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter Two

In the distance, she heard a cell door creak open. She tried to lift her head to see who it was, but her neck hurt too much, a result of three hours of nonstop beatings.

"So, Detective, are you ready to talk yet?" asked the man standing over Olivia, who was bound with her hands above her head.

"No way in hell." She knew what she was doing would end up costing her dearly, but she was only giving fair warning to the man standing over her.

"We both know you'll end up changing your mind before long," said her captor, as he bent down, took a hold of Olivia's wrist and bent it until it gave a sicken snap.

"That's for being the defiant little bitch you are. I wouldn't put it past you to find a way to find trouble. You have quite the reputation, Detective. But, what do you expect for a detective who went out by herself without her partner."

Again, Olivia had nothing to say. She knew what he said was true. She should have had her partner with her, but she insisted to go it alone. She'd gone on many assignments by herself, and made it back alive. This time, though, she probably wouldn't make it out alive.

"You're not very talkative tonight are you?" asked the captor again as he started throwing kicks at Liv's stomach. She could feel with each kick her ribs breaking. The captor stopped as Olivia groaned and gasped for breath.

"Are you going to tell me where the files are, or do you need a little more convincing?" asked the captor.

"I...have no idea where the f-files are," said Olivia between breaths as she tried to take in another breath, but it hurt her to breath the way she was now. In the back of her mind, she was wondering how much longer she was going to be able to last. She knew the beatings were only just beginning. Just how much more was she going to be able to take before they finally killed her or she was miraculously rescued?

"Enough with the bull shit, Benson. We both know a detective like you has close-ties with the feds. Where are the files?" the captor said with yet another bone-snapping kick to Olivia's ribs.

"I haven't seen them since your trial," she said before being kicked in the side of the face. She could feel her teeth part company with her gums and she could taste blood.

So that was a bold-faced lie. A select few, Olivia included, had seen the files. Cragen gave Olivia the files for safe keeping who, in turn, gave the files to Elliot to keep. Now, she was grateful she did. The files wouldn't do her any good here. It did, however, give both of them an advantage: her captors knew she had seen the files, but they didn't know she actually had them.

"Enough with the fucking lies. You're a good liar, Detective, but we know you're hiding something. And since you're not telling us willingly, we'll have to beat it out of you," he said, as he aimed another kick at Liv's face, this time breaking her nose and spraying blood everywhere. Olivia Benson said nothing.

After what seemed like a beating that would never end, Olivia was tossed into an empty cell. Her badly broken wrist throbbing in pain and her newly broken nose still bleeding badly. No matter how tough she was, no matter how defiant she was, they were still determined to make her talk. She wasn't going to make it too much more here, even if the beatings stopped. She was going to die here, in this tiny cell.


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter Three

"She's going to make it home, right?" asked Isaac Jackson, as he fidgeted with his badge. This whole ordeal was taking its toll on the young detective. He wasn't suppose to be there. Cragen had sent fresh teams out to search New York again. It was taking it's toll on all of them, for that matter. Now that Detective Benson wasn't with them, it not only shook him up a hell of a lot more, but it made him even more unsecured than he had been when she was with them. Jackson believed that Olivia would keep them safe and out of harm's way. They all did for that matter, and because of that confidence, she was gone.

"Of course she'll make it home. She's probably got her escape plan all ready to put into action," said Munch, his feet resting on his desk. The tall gangly man said it with a half-assed smile, as a siren went off somewhere. It was such a familiar sound to them all by now that no one bothered to look up. Munch tried his best to reassure Jackson that they'd find her, but everyone's hope of ever seeing Liv again were fading fast. It'd been four weeks now, and there was still no sign of her whereabouts.

Munch looked over at Stabler. For the first time in the thirty years he'd been an SVU detective could he actually remember being worried about his teammate. He hadn't spoken a word since he found out Liv was missing. All he did was sit and stare off into the distance.

Everyone, even those who weren't apart of the SVU knew Elliot and Olivia shared a special bond, that they would protect each other at all costs, and being fully aware of the fact that he hadn't been there to protect her was killing him on the inside.

Elliot could feel Munch looking in his direction. He knew Munch was concerned, but he didn't care. Elliot knew that everyone, Cragen included, were trying to convince each other that, at any given moment, Olivia would walk into the station, unharmed and alive.

He couldn't fool himself though, he knew he should have gone with her, even though she insisted to go it alone. He put his hand into his pocket, and felt a small box; the engagement ring he was going to give to her. Now, a symbol of the life they would possibly never share together.

No matter how hard they tried to hide it, Olivia's disappearance was hard on all of them. All of them, in one way or another got to know Olivia, even if they worked under her or with her. She wasn't just the squad's best detective, she was everyone's close friend.

Loosing her and knowing they'd probably never see her again hurt them even more. Those who knew Olivia (who worked with her from the very beginning, I mean) knew that the hard-headed stubbornness was just an act. That deep down, she was a fiery, passionate woman who was ready and willing to help anyone in need.

Despite desperate attempts at keeping their hope and faith alive, the fog of doubt and pessimism spread throughout the station as the days ticked by, marking the fourth week Olivia wasn't with them. Could it be more than that? Could it be the fact that the truth was sneaking up on them (by truth, I mean that Olivia was never going to return, at least alive or unharmed?) Some realized by now that Olivia didn't always have a plan at the ready to put into action, that she almost always followed her instincts and sometimes acted on impulse when those she cared most about were in danger.

"Elliot. Hello, earth to Elliot. You ok?" asked Munch, as he tried to get Elliot's attention for the last half hour. Elliot had been staring off into space again. Cragen told him it wasn't healthy to think about not seeing her again. He was trying to keep Elliot busy with desk work to try to get him to focus. His efforts were futile, because all Elliot could do was sit and think of the life he was never going to share with the woman he loved.

"What? Oh, yeah, I was just thinking about something is all," he said, shaking his head to rid himself of the thought. He was thinking back to the night before Olivia disappeared, to the night of pure passion they shared before she was called off on an assignment (A/N: don't worry, I'm not going to go into explicit detail what they did that night, so y'all can get your minds out of the gutter.)

The squad of detectives fell quiet again, until Elliot stood up. All eyes in the room turned in his direction, eager to hear what his plan was. He placed his gun back in the inner pocket of his jacket, which was slung over the back of his desk chair (he had is gun out to have something in his hands. If he didn't have that out, he would sit and stare at the ring box.) He also tucked the ring box back into his pocket, so he could give it to Olivia if- or should I say- when he found her.

"I'm going to go find her, and I will bring her home," said Elliot, grabbing his jacket off his chair and heading out the door. He knew in the back of his mind that, if he found anything, it would probably be her dead corpse, but he couldn't take just sitting at his desk doing nothing. It was killing him that all he was doing was sitting there in the fucking station, when he could be out there alongside every other search team.

Everyone that wasn't already assigned to a search team followed Elliot out the door. Those who followed knew it wouldn't be long before Elliot made the first move in the four weeks since her disappearance. It took them a while to get ready, but, before long, the small band of men, Cragen included set off to find Olivia...


	4. Chapter 4

Chapter Four

Almost four weeks. Liv Benson had miraculously managed to survive four weeks of nonstop beatings. To Olivia, of course had no idea how long it had been. To her, it felt like a lifetime. Her captors stopped feeding her after about the fourth day in this hell hole and they stopped giving her water about three days ago. Not only that, but they still continued to beat the information they wanted out of her.

Her torture wasn't just physical, it was mental also. She was forced to watch as the prisoners around were murdered in cold blood before her very eyes. When that didn't break down her defenses and make her talk, they continued the beatings. She couldn't even move without her wounds causing unbearable amounts of pain.

She constantly tasted blood, due to the fact that many of her teeth had been knocked out. At first, when she was first taken prisoner, she kept telling herself that it wasn't that bad, and that it could be a hell of a lot worse. She kept herself alive by telling herself that she was going to get through this, and be back with her loved ones in no time. She could get through this, despite the fact that every bone in her body hurt like hell and she couldn't take a breath without the unbearable pain from her broken ribcage.

About seven days later, however, she gave up that notion. The men that had taken Liv captive moved from breaking her bones to stabbing and whipping. She had a long gash up her back that wouldn't quit bleeding no matter what she did. The bleeding eventually slowed down, but it always bled fresh each time she moved.

Lately, however, there was no movement from the detective. She lay on the cement ground bloody, broken, and shaking. She was breathing, but it as ragged, and could only be heard if you were standing close to the cell. Other than her jagged breathing, she hadn't moved for almost two days. Her captors tried waking her up by throwing chips of dry ice at her, but that didn't work. She was as good as dead, so, they left her where she lay to die.

Later that night, the sound of running and shouting could be heard for miles. "Check every room in this god damned building! Arrest anyone you find and tell me ASAP if you find her," shouted Elliot, as the men scattered. The orders sounded strange to his ears, but at the same time, sounded so familiar. He prayed to no god in particular that they would find Olivia and, if it came to it, give her the proper burial she deserved. He hoped and prayed that wouldn't be the case, that they would find her alive, but, with the ways things looked, he wouldn't get his hopes up.

"CAPITAN! ELLIOT! WE FOUND HER!" Fin yelled. He ran down a particularly dark cell block, his flashlight waving like mad between each cell. He almost ran past her without a second thought (everyone else in the cellblock was dead.) He was certain the person in this cell was dead also, but, when he went up closer, and turned the body over gently, to his horror, he realized it was the bloody, broken body as Liv Benson. She was alive, thank goodness, she looked like hell, she was shaking badly, and her breath was jagged and labored and her pulse was very weak, but she was alive.

Hearing the news, Elliot turned and ran up the cell block he was in towards the next one where Fin had made his gruesome discovery. He skidded to a halt, almost knocking Cragen over when he saw the condition of his partner. Tears burned in his eyes as Fin looked up at him in horror.

"My god, Liv. What have those bastards done to you?" Elliot whispered as he looked down at Liv's almost unrecognizable body. She was very thin, pale, bloody, and broken. Elliot saw the marks where the whip tore away at her skin and he also saw how badly she was shaking.

Elliot picked her up bridal-style, earning himself a groan from the dying detective as his hands grabbed at her broken bones. He tried shifting her in his arms, but it didn't do much good. Fin tried to take her from him, but he was met with a mixed look of determination, grief, horror, and anger.

"We need to get her out of here now. She needs to get medical help fast or she's not going to make it," said Elliot as he ran as fast as he could with Liv in his arms. There was an ambulance outside waiting for them, ready and waiting to take the dead or dying to the hospital or morgue (whichever was appropriate.)

"She's cold," said Elliot, as he climbed in the back of the ambulance. He rested Liv's head on his lap and stroked her bloody cheek. Fin, who had also climbed in with Elliot handed him a nearby blanket as the ambulance jerked to life. One of the medic who was standing by, looked down at Liv with a look of admiration, his young face pale. He had heard of the brave Olivia Benson, but it was such a pity she had to be seen this way. The tech moved what remained of Liv's shirt aside to begin cleaning her wounds. As much as he wanted to help, there was little he could do in the back of an ambulance.

"I don't think she'll make it through the trip to the hospital," the tech said to Elliot, who was still holding on to Liv's body. He wasn't about to let her go. He made that mistake once already. She couldn't die, not now, not here when he could have stopped this whole fucking thing from ever happening. He held her in his arms against the bumps in the road. She looked so frail and fragile, and he could do nothing to help her. "Don't leave me. Don't leave me, god damn it. You say with me, ok?" Elliot whispered into her ear, hoping that she would hear what he said.

"Don't you even think about leaving me. I'm so sorry I couldn't protect you," he said as tears fell onto her battered bloody face.

Her eyes opened for a few seconds, looking up at Elliot and over at Fin. He didn't think he'd ever see her dark eyes open again, but she was looking at him. "Hang on a bit longer, Liv. Hold on for the SVU, hold on for me," he whispered again, as she violently shook in his arms.

They hit a nasty hole on the road and she gave a yelp of pain as she closed her eyes, leaving the conscious world behind her again. He held her tighter, brushing her matted hair out of her eyes. "Don't worry, everything will be alright," he whispered. He said it, not only to comfort her, but also to comfort himself.


	5. Chapter 5

Chapter 5

They reached the hospital about four hours ago, but no update on what her condition was. She had been rushed to surgery the moment they got to the hospital, and has been in there ever since.

The ride to the hospital was horrible. There were so many bumps and potholes, it was fucking ridiculous. Elliot held her close the whole way there, with Fin standing close by just in case. Every little bump or pothole made the barely conscious detective yelp in pain. She stopped breathing about three times on the way to the hospital. They revived her, but they knew she wouldn't be able to last much longer if things kept going the way they were.

Once Liv was whisked away to surgery, Elliot completely broke down. He fell to his knees with tears streaming from his eyes, as though somewhere, deep down, a dam that had kept all his emotion back had been broken.

His cries were a heartbreaking sound to the rest of the SVU team. He failed her, and he knew it. The only promise he had ever made to her, the most important one, he broke within a single action. The whole ordeal ended with the death of the woman he loved most. He let her walk into the trap that had been set for her, and now she was as good as dead. He wanted to die with her, because, in his mind, he had no other reason to live if she was gone. He sobbed her name again and again, crying out for his beloved Olivia.

Munch tried to comfort Elliot, but it was no use. Still with no update on her condition, he took off for the hospital chapel to think. Elliot was sobbing silently into his hands when a gentle hand got his attention. Looking up, it was Munch.

Elliot threw his arms around Munch (A/N: He's grieving for crying out loud! Munch was the first person to try to comfort him, and he needed someone strong to support him. So get your minds out of the gutters, ELIOT ISN'T GAY!) Munch and Elliot sat in the chapel as Elliot continued to sob into his hands.

All of them were grieving. They all were close to her, but not as close as he was. Almost everyone, Cragen included had a suspicion that there was more than just business or a friendly relationship; there was even a bet going as to how long it would take one of them to make a move. The two of them were always together, even if it wasn't related to a case, they were even spotted shopping together (three guesses who it was that spotted them... you guessed it, Munch and Fin.) They had a bet that Liv and Elliot were in love, even if they would never admit it in their wildest day dreams.

"Detec...Elliot, it's going to be ok. She's a fighter, she'll pull through," said Munch as his voice broke trying to hold back tears. He wanted to cry also, to grieve for the loss they would eventually have to deal with. He couldn't do that though; he knew he had to be strong for the both of them, he wasn't about to break down. Not now, not here.

"None of this is your fault," said Munch, after Elliot finally calmed down. He knew all of them, every single detective sitting in that waiting room felt guilty for allowing this to happen. That they hadn't done anything to stop her from going out alone, and that it took them so long to find her. Even Munch felt the weight of guilt on his shoulders for not doing anything to stop her, or try to convince her to take someone with her. They knew the dangers, they knew what could happen, but they did nothing to stop her.

The other SVU detectives joined Munch and Elliot in the chapel after a while. Jackson was sitting in a pew with his head in his hands, tears pouring down his face onto the carpeted floor. Green was sitting a bit farther down from Jackson, staring at the floor, a few tears trickling down his face also. Carter, a detective from the Bronx SVU was sitting staring at the wall, lost in his own thoughts. All of them could hear what Munch was saying through Elliot's renewed sobbing. They all wanted to believe she was going to make it, that she would be back to work in no time. Who were they kidding? Only themselves. They saw the condition she was in when they found her, they just didn't want to give up hope.

Now that Elliot had finally broken down, it was all over. They had never seen his this upset before (who could blame him?) He was so strong, hiding any emotion at all behind a brick wall. Hearing his sobbing now was just as distressing as the news they just received.

It was all over.

...

Sorry about the cliff hanger... Stay tuned to hear what happens...


	6. Chapter 6

Chapter 6

_Where the fuck am I? Am I dead?_ This was the first conscious thought that came to Olivia's mind as she held on to the thin thread of her life. She had been through so much, only to end up hanging close to the jaws of death. She hadn't really been one who believed in things like god or the afterlife, but she was sure she was dead. Her body felt like it weighed a ton, she couldn't even move her eyes, so she couldn't see where she was. The only thing she could feel was the throbbing pain that shot all over her body when she tried to move. If she could feel this pain, she had to be alive, right?

Part of her was very scared of this reality she was in. _What if_, she thought, _I stayed this way, being able to think, but not move?_ She could hear noises all around her, but where they were coming from or what they were coming from, she couldn't tell. One of these noises sounded strangely familiar. Part of her wanted to remember what this noise was, or who was talking. She knew she had heard it before, but she just couldn't tell who it was. The voice sounded so far away to her, that it just disoriented her even more.

She tried desperately to open her eyes. It was so painful for her to do something so fucking simple, it took all her strength and she gave up. She heard the voice say her name, this much was very clear to her, Olivia Benson. She heard it, but she just couldn't hang on to her thoughts anymore. The throbbing pain was just too much for her body to handle, and her thoughts ceased once more.

Cragen went to talk to one of the nurses after Elliot regain a little bit of his composure. He excused himself by saying that he needed to get some fresh air. This was partly true, but mostly, he couldn't stand just sitting doing nothing anymore. The sound of heavy rain and winds helped him to block things out.

"Olivia Benson. Please, I need to see her," Elliot pleaded for the last half an hour.

It was very clear to the nurses that he had been crying, even the ones that hadn't seen him break down. He wasn't allowed into her room due to the "legalities" of only family was aloud to see her.

The hospital staff had tried to track down someone from her family, but Elliot knew it was a pointless act. Her father was in prison and her mother killed herself a couple years ago. He was sure she didn't have any siblings, so it didn't come as a surprise when she left the part of making medical decisions if she wasn't capable of making them to Elliot.

He wasn't exactly sure if he wanted to call it a loophole that allowed him in, but, nevertheless, he was very thankful for it. Taking the seat next to her bed, he looked down at Liv. It shocked him to see her this way. Of course, he had been there when they found her, but the image was forever carved into his mind. She looked dead. If he hadn't seen the jagged rise and fall of her chest, he would have thought he had come in too late and the only reason they let him in finally was because she was dead.

"Oh, Liv," he said with a very heavy and sad sigh. He brushed some of her auburn hair from her face. It was a very sharp contrast from her sickeningly pale skin. He noticed as his brushed her forehead that her skin was a bit warmer than it had been on the way here. Thank god for that, but her skin was still cold.

"I'm so sorry, Liv," he said, wiping fresh tears from his eyes. He wished with all his heart that she would open her eyes again, to give him a small ray of hope. Couldn't she move just a bit, was it too much to ask for?

"You're such a fool," he told her. It was almost like he was telling her off for chasing after a serial killer again. If only she would say something back, it would be like old times.

"Why? Why did you do that?" he asked her as tears filled his eyes again. "You should have taken one of us with you. It wasn't worth what you went through, god damn it! They believed you would return in one piece, damn it! And now you're going to leave us here?" he wanted to shake her, hit her, even shoot at her. He wanted her to hear him know what she was putting them through, him through.

"Didn't you know I loved you? Don t you know how much you've hurt me? I know, you'll probably never know it, but I just need to tell you. I know it's against the rules for me to say these things, and I know you'd do the same if you were me, but I needed to say it," he said. He knew she couldn't hear him, but he wanted to get it out. He didn't know if he would live to see the next day without saying it out loud. He had been keeping this to himself, the only other person who knew was Mumbo, his dog, only because the dog couldn't tell anyone. He felt as though his deep dark secret was going to make him explode.


	7. Chapter 7

Chapter 7

The SVU squad had been told she wouldn't make it through the night, which they all knew was possible, but they dreaded it. It was a huge surprise for them then, when they received news at dawn that she was still alive. However, her worsened condition left no one at ease.

She was still unconscious, and she hadn't shown any signs of waking since she had been brought here. Her shivering from when they first found her began again, but it wasn't from being cold anymore. It was from a high fever that had risen dangerously over night as the infection from her wounds spread throughout her body. From the looks of it, it would be safe to say hope was rapidly draining from her.

Everything had been done to try to stabilize her. They had done surgery to get as much of the infection under control as possible, and now she was hooked up to IVs that gave her blood, nutrients, and antibiotics, but it just wasn't enough. None of it was working.

Elliot had been allowed to spend the night in her room. He hadn't left her side, worried that, if he did, he'd miss something or something would happen to her. He literally counted every breath she took as he helplessly watched as her condition worsened. He hadn't been aware of slipping his hand through the bars to touch her face, but he could feel her now shockingly warm skin as he curled himself up on the chair he had been sitting in for the past fourteen hours. It was a slight surprise to him when he saw the sun was coming up.

"How's she doing?" asked Fin, as he opened the door with a slight knock. He looked from Elliot to Liv as the others filed in behind him. There was no doubt in his mind that Elliot hadn't slept at all last night. Fin's mouth fell open when he saw his comrade's condition. She looked, if it was possible at all, worse than she had been when they found her. Her face had shrunken in and her body seemed so gray and frail.

"They let you guys in?" asked Elliot, looking up at the group gathered, very surprised to see them all.

"Well, she doesn't have any family around, so I guess we count," said Munch.

"She's not doing well. She's getting worse actually." It was amazing to them all at how he could keep all his emotion out of his voice. He wanted so badly to sob, but he had a hollow, and slightly hoarse voice.

"If you want, Elliot, one of us could stay, and you could go get some sleep," Beck piped up.

"Thank you for your concern Beck, but I really need to stay here," he said.

His response came as no surprise to anyone. They all knew his devotion to the woman lying unconscious in the bed. It was a very somber moment to see him watch her so intently.

"Well, if you're not going to rest, you should at least eat something," said Cragen, who was leaning against the wall, a glint of concern in his brown eyes. He wondered in the back of his mind what would happen if Liv really did die...well, when she'll die more like it, it's just a matter of time now (don t worry, Cragen isn't that cold-hearted.) They weren't fooling themselves, she was going to die and they knew it wouldn't take long, judging from her gradually worsening condition.

He didn't look at the Capitan and didn't bother to answer him either. It was clear he didn't want to talk, it was also clear that he didn't want any of them in there with him. The only thing he wanted was a miracle that he knew would never happen.

"I'll bring you something a bit later," he said, and with that, Cragen and the other detectives filed out.

"They're so worried about you, Liv. I just wish you could see it. Well, maybe not, because it would just make you angry," he told her after he hear the door click.

He didn't shed tears this time, he simply couldn't do it today. His eyes still burned from all the tears he shed yesterday. "I don t know what they'd do if you didn't wake up. I don t know what I'd do," he said, straightening his blanket. "We need you here, Liv."

He looked up from the blanket and stared at the blank wall for a second when he felt a movement and something warm curling around his hand. Liv had curled her fingers around his hand. At this, Elliot smiled for the first time in what he thought was a century.


	8. Chapter 8

Chapter 8

He loved her? Did she hear him correctly, or had she been dreaming? She wasn't exactly sure, but she hoped it was the first. Why did she do it? It was obvious, wasn't it? It really surprised her that he asked that question. He should have known this. She would do anything for her team, even if it meant going on a dangerous assignment and loosing her life over it. They were her brothers, her friends, her family. Why wouldn't she do that for them? She was certain he'd to the same if he were in her shoes.

He didn't need to be sorry, he didn't do anything wrong. She wanted to hug him, to pull him close. She wanted to yell at him for thinking it was his fault she was in this state. If it wasn't for the huge amounts of morphine being pumped into her system, she would surely cry out. Knowing that her team and the person she loved most were ok was worth it. Knowing that he was in here with her, touching her sure as hell made it worth the pain.

She was a fool, well, it wasn't the first time he had called her that. Usually, that, and everything else he said for that matter, was all true. Usually she had done something wrong that should have been obvious wouldn't work, but not this time. This time, he was the fool for not believing in himself. It wasn't always his fault-scratch that it was rarely his fault. Everyone else believed in her, he said it before. He told her how much everyone admired her strength.

That was great, but why did it matter that they believed in her? It was nice to hear that her team believed in her, but she didn't care about what they thought. She wanted him to believe in her.

She didn't mean to hurt him. She did it because it was part of her job to go on an assignment. Did he seriously not know that she loved him also? Had she been THAT stupid? Had she been that stupid not to let him know a little bit of how she felt for him? Damn it all, she hadn't told him and, from the looks of things, she wasn't going to have another chance. Stupid! she thought to herself, why didn't I tell him? Was she scared that he'd reject her? Could he not see past her loyalty and devotion, or was his act just that good? Could she be that blind to not see that there was more than just loyalty before now?

She could feel his touch, and with her gathered strength, managed to curl her fingers around his hand before she lost all conscious thought again.

He had fallen asleep, his head resting on the edge of her bed, their hands still entwined. Cragen left him some food on the bed table. His hair had been rumpled from the many times he ran his fingers through it (a nervous habit of his.) His much needed sleep had been interrupted when he heard a violent, raspy cough coming from the slowly dying detective. Instantly, as if powered by impulse, he stood up, ready to run and get the nearest doctor, but he stopped when he saw her eyes open.

"Liv?" he asked, his tired face reflecting deep concern. "Liv, can you hear me?" Her eyes squinted against the bright light of her hospital room. She hadn't seen this much light in weeks. Her world seemed to swim in and out of focus. She tried to focus on where his voice was coming from, but it was too difficult for her.

"El-liot?" she asked, her voice a bit uncertain. She was sure it was his voice she heard, but she had to keep her eyes closed from getting sick. Was she still in that cell, or had she been freed? Either way, she couldn't tell.

"How...How are you feeling?" Elliot asked, his voice cracking for a split second.

"How do you think...Where am I?" she asked, her voice hoarse from disuse.

"You're in the hospital," he said gently.

"How long have I been here? What the hell happened to me?" she asked. She had been freed, thank god! She was afraid that he tried to rescue her, and that they were both trapped in that hell hole.

"I should go tell the doctors you're awake," he said, standing up suddenly.

Why was he avoiding her questions? She heard the hesitancy in his voice. What was he not telling her? The pain was killing her, but she wanted to know the truth.

"Elliot, tell me what the hell happened to me," she said, wincing as she tried to sit up.

"I should let the doctors tell you," he said.

"Elliot, what the fuck aren't you telling me? I want to know the truth!"

He sighed deeply, and walked back over to her bed, trying to keep his emotion down before he spoke again.

"You were hurt badly. The doctors told us that you weren't going to make it through the night. You have a massive infection from your wounds, so they've been giving you all known medicine known to man. You have many broken bones, mainly from the nonstop beatings you endured. The doctors have done several surgeries to try to repair the worst of your injuries and internal bleeding, but, so far, nothing has worked. You haven't been doing well since we brought you here. We lost you four times on the way here. You've had us all scared to death."

She tried to move to a sitting position, and managed to only raise her head when a blinding pain hit her like a ton of bricks. She lay her head back down, closing her eyes and listened to him.

"I hear what you said while I was unconscious. Was it true? About you loving me?" she asked, opening her eyes a bit to look at him.

He said nothing, but turned to smile at her and left the room...


	9. Chapter 9

Chapter 9

Hearing the door shut quietly behind him, Olivia closed her eyes, trying to regain the sleep she desperately needed. Waking up wasn't her best idea, for she was beginning to feel the pain of breathing again, despite broken ribs. She knew it wouldn't be too long before he came back in with a doctor, but she used the time to it's fullest potential.

"Well, they weren't kidding when they said you were a 'stubborn woman', Detective Benson."

At this comment, Liv made a sound in annoyance. Her five minutes of much desired sleep were interrupted, but she couldn't help smirking as she wondered who made the comment. Her bet was on either Munch or Fin.

The doctor put the rails of the bed down and leaned into her face with a bright light, which earned him another annoyed sound as Liv closed her eyes against the blinding light for a second before she gave it up, which earned her the worst headache she had ever had.

"Well, you have yourself a quite severe concussion, and your eyes are a bit sensitive from seeing so much light."

No fucking shit! She hadn't seen normal light since she disappeared. If he knew what her reaction would be before the test, what was the point in testing her? Would they leave her alone for a while? Her head was pounding like she had the worst hangover in history, and the lights and noise weren't helping either.

"The people that came in with you were very relieved when they got the news you woke up. None of them have left the building since they brought you in," said the doctor, as he started peeling away at the numerous bandages on Liv's arms (some of which made her wince.) "Especially the young man who has been in here with you the last few days. Now I see what everyone's been talking about. You really do live up to the stories I've heard, Ms. Benson."

Was this doctor seriously blind, or could he not see that Olivia wasn't in the mood for a conversation? Did he really think she was interesting in what went on while she was out? She looked around, a bit surprised that Elliot hadn't come in with the doctor. She guessed that he was the one who told the others she was finally awake.

"They beat you up pretty badly. You're on some pretty heavy antibiotics, but they don't seem to be getting rid of the infection. This may hurt a bit," he said, as he pulled away the last layer of bandage that stuck to her bruised and broken arm.

Liv hissed in obvious pain before turning to see how badly her arm was really broken. She knew it would be bad (well, why wouldn't it, seeing as what she had been through!) It hurt like a mother fucker, but when she actually saw it, it made her stomach turn over. The skin was a sickly purple-gray-yellow-green color with long red lines running up and down the length of her arm, the tell tale sign of a huge and possibly deadly infection. It was also swollen with numerous stitches running up her arm.

She remembered with horror, her captors breaking the bones in her arms one by one the first day. She could only remember up to about the seventh day, when they took a barbed whip to her bare back and cut her arm up like a fillet of fish, but she couldn't remember what the fuck happened to make her arm look the way it did.

"He said he told you how bad it was," said the doctor with an expression of sickening surprise.

"Yeah, he did. I just didn't think it was that bad," she said, realizing that it was stupid to think Elliot was exaggerating.

"We may have to do some more surgery in the next few days to get the infection under control," he continued.

"That's what he was saying."

"He's been worried about you. They all have, for that matter," he said.

"He always worries about me," she said. Was this guy really going to give her a lecture, right now? She's in the middle of recovery for Christ's sake!

"Hearing all the stories, I can see why he's always worried."

She didn't answer him, she just wanted desperately to go back to sleep.

"Is he a boyfriend of yours?"

"No, he's my partner." Did it really matter to this guy what relationship she had with him? Had he not been in uniform, that would be a dead giveaway at how far their relationship had gone. He couldn't be her boyfriend, her husband, or any of that. He was just a good friend and her partner. That would definitely change after she got out of the hospital, however.

"You should be very thankful for him and all of them," said the doctor, smiling, as he applied fresh bandages to her wounds.

"I know. I don-" She broke off when the doctor applied a fresh bandage to her shoulder. The pain in his touch caught her off guard. Who knew such a light touch could send so much blinding pain shooting up her arm, she had to bite down hard on her lip to keep from crying out in agony. She jerked her arm away, only to cause more blinding pain.

She squeezed her eyes tightly shut as her breaths became more and more shallow. It was a damn good thing Elliot hadn't been there to see the sudden burst of pain.

The doctor was amazed at such a strong reaction to such a light touch. When her body didn't seem to want to relax, he gave her another dose of morphine. Such sensitivity to light touches wasn't a good sign.

When, at long last, the doctor finally left an hour later, Elliot resumed his place next to Liv, who, he presumed was sleeping.

"Yes, Liv. What I said was true. All of it," he whispered. When he said this, Liv smiled...


	10. Chapter 10

Chapter 10

"Mornin' Liv!" said Munch, his usual sarcastic grin on his face as he walked in behind Fin and Cragen. He was followed closely by two other detectives.

Their unwanted arrival caused an annoyed groan from the detective, who wanted nothing more than to pick up her pillow and press it over her face to block them out. Sadly for her, she didn't have the energy to move. If she did, moving wouldn't be worth the pain that came with it. She might as well give up the idea of sleep anytime soon.

"Nice to see you too, Liv," said Fin, as he took up the seat that Elliot usually sat in. Fin couldn't help but smile. Liv must be ok, she was back to normal.

"Russell and Benton came by to see you, but you were out cold. The others have been asking about you also," said Fin

"How are they doing?" she asked, trying to sit up, which was a bad idea, given her present condition.

"They're fine. Worried about you, but fine."

It wasn't that she wasn't happy to see her fellow detectives. She was happy to see them with her own eyes. She just didn't feel like talking or listening to anyone (who could blame her?) She just wanted to go back to the dreamless, drug-educed sleep.

"No offense Liv, but you can be really stupid sometimes," said Munch.

What the fuck was with him calling her stupid? If anyone was stupid, it was them for not believing in her.

"How are you feeling?" asked Cragen.

"Great, can't you tell?" she said, her tone drenched with venom and sarcasm.

"Ah, the good old venomous sarcastic stubborn Olivia we all know and love. Pay up, Fin," said Munch. They had bet on what her mood would be before they came in, typical. All of them were gamblers (well, all but Elliot.)

"So, was it you who called me, oh what was it? A 'stubborn woman' Munch?" she asked Munch, slightly amused.

"Who told you that?" he asked.

"The doctor, when he came in to check on me."

"Well, you can't say that isn't true. This is the second time you've defied death," he said as they all laughed.

"Really, though, how have you been feeling? You've had us all worried, scared, and depressed. We've all slept in the waiting room. Well all of us except Elliot. He hasn't left your side since we found you and brought you here," said Munch. He loved teasing her whenever he could, and he knew it was a bit out of Elliot's character to be worried sick, but seeing her when they found her shook him up pretty badly.

She was fully aware of the risks that came with her job. She'd seen others get hurt, and she'd even been hurt a couple times. She had seen her friends come within an inch of death. She knew all of them were bound to get banged up sooner or later. Some stitches, a couple broken bones here and there, bumps and bruises were nothing new to them. Seeing your best friend in such bad shape though was something he wasn't going to get out of his head for a while.

Liv's face was emotionless as she looked up at the men gathered around her. Munch wasn't as stupid as some thought he was. He knew something was very wrong, well beyond the obvious. He knew they owed her their support, loyalty, and worry. They knew her career as a detective might be over, depending on what would happen in the next few days. She knew she would be replaced over the time it would take her to recover. She's seen it plenty of times before.

"Earth to Liv! Liv, you ok?" asked Munch, when Liv spaced out and was staring at the blank wall behind Cragen.

"Wha-oh. Yeah, I'm fine. I'm a stubborn woman like you said. I'll be out of here in no time," she told them confidently with a smirk on her face, which was enough for them.

When they left an hour or so later, Liv closed her eyes as a sign that she was exhausted. She opened them a bit when she heard the door click shut behind Elliot as he came in again.

"You didn't tell them what the doctors said, did you?" he asked as he sat down. He let the guys and Liv chat while he took a well-deserved break. It was kind of nice having time to herself without having to worry.

"They don't need anything more to worry about right now. They've been worried enough," she said, turning her head to look at him. He looked a bit better, like he had time to sleep and have something to eat.

"Do you really think you could hide it from them? If something worse does happen, they have a right to know," he told her, wondering in the back of his mind how she could have missed that hugely obvious detail.

She sighed slightly. Fuck it all, why did he always have to be right?

"I'll worry about it when the time comes. Right now, I don't give a flying fuck," she said, hoping he'd get the message she was ready to pass out.

"You're the biggest procrastinator I've ever met," he told her, with a hint of teasing in his voice. He knew she was tired, that's why he didn't peruse the conversation.

"And you're very sexy," she said, before closing her eyes and letting her head hit the pillow.

He stared at her for a second after this comment, his face going a deep shade of red that it had never gone before. Sexy? Did Liv really mean that, or was it the fact that she was so drugged, she had a hard time keeping her thoughts to herself, let alone keeping her eyes open for almost two hours?

"I-I don't think you know what're talking about, Liv," he said.

"And Munch had the guts to call me the stupid one," she said with a smile before finally drifting off to sleep.


	11. Chapter 11

Chapter 11

Elliot's eyes snapped open and he sat up in his chair, as if he was waking from a horrible nightmare. He wasn't exactly sure what woke him up so suddenly, but he wasn't going to dwell on it. It must have been the wee hours of the morning, because the sun wasn't up yet. He looked down at his watch, it was only 2:00 am. He was going to excuse it as one of the nurses coming in to check on Liv, no big deal. He was going to check on her himself anyway.

When he looked down at her, he could tell something was very wrong. It couldn't have been more obvious to him, even in the pitch black. He checked her body for any new injuries, but couldn't find any. He touched her neck to check her pulse which was dangerously weak and rapid, he could hear her breathing, which was also shallow and weak. Her fever had risen dangerously overnight. In a futile effort to cool her down, Elliot pulled back her blankets. It didn't work. Her fever was much too high.

"Liv," he said, tapping her face, trying to wake her up. When she didn't respond to this, he shook her shoulder gently (he was trying his best to wake her up, but not hurt her, give him a break.)

She gave him a shallow groan when he touched her and turned her head away as his response. She blinked open her eyes, but they were unfocused and foggy (from the illness.) She tried to move away from his hand, so she could rest, but she could only whimper from the intense pain.

"Liv, can you hear me? Come on, baby, talk to me, Livia," he asked. It really worried him to see her this way. She had been doing so well, what could have happened? he thought.

"If you're playing a game, this isn't funny. Come on, Liv, talk to me," he warned her. He was trying anything he could think of to get her conscious enough to tell him she was ok, but she didn't, and it was starting to worry Elliot. Panic swelled inside him as he left to find a nurse.

"Oh, hello Detective, can I help you?" asked a short red-headed nurse at the nurses' station.

"It's Detective Benson. I-I think something's wrong with her," he said, as he started to shake, his voice shaky and his face full of obvious fear and worry.

"Ok, calm down, and tell me what happened," she said, steering Elliot to the nearest chair (to save him from keeling over he was shaking so badly.)

"She wouldn't respond when I tried waking her up, and her fever has risen drastically," he said, as he stood up to take the nurse back to Liv's room.

He waited in the door way as the nurse check Liv over. He watched the nurse closely for any sign on how Liv was doing. When he saw her frown, he tensed up as he waited for what the nurse was going to say.

"I'm calling the doctor," she said suddenly.

His eyes widened a little in worry. It couldn't be a good sign when she had to call in the doctor for something she couldn't handle. Something was very wrong here. His mind was racing with ideas as to what could be wrong with her, each worse than the next.

"What's wrong?" he asked, trying to keep his voice from shaking again. Panic raising in his chest.

"The doctor will be able to figure out what's happening better than I can," she told him. She hardly knew the man, but she could tell he was very worried (duh, why wouldn't he be?)

About ten minutes later, the doctor walked into the small room. He looked up when he saw Elliot standing by Liv's bed (as if he was protecting her from something.)

"I'm sorry Detective, I'm going to have to ask you to step outside," he told Elliot. He wasn't exactly sure if he was going to give up his protective watch over her, but it would be best if he didn't protest. He wasn't up for an argument this early in the morning.

Sighing, he walked slowly from the room and closed the door. He stood there, refusing to go farther than right outside the door as he waited for the doctor to let him back in. It wasn't as if he hadn't seen everything the doctor was seeing. He saw her wounds, even before they had been closed up and the bones that had been set back into place. Not to mention what he had seen while on the job (all night assignments, no one allowed to go home.)

It was very hard for him to just stand out there doing nothing. He didn't want to leave her, but he knew it just would have done more damage if he protested. His racing thoughts were interrupted when a loud blood-curdling scream filled the hospital air. In one motion, he threw open the door and burst into the room, his gun raised to shoot whatever the hell was causing Liv so much pain.

Liv's teeth were gritted and her eyes were squeezed shut against the agonizing pain. The little color that had been in her face was gone again, leaving her pale and ghostly. Her chest was heaving, as though she had ran a three mile marathon. His eyes shot to the doctor, who, in turn was looking at him in small surprise. He looked him over carefully. He hadn't done anything but remove the bandages from Liv's mangled arm.

"Sorry," he said, a razor's tone to his voice, still on edge from overreacting. He didn't like hearing Liv scream in pain. "What's wrong with her?" he asked.

"It's the infection. It's spreading too rapidly for my liking. I'm taking her to surgery right now," he said, standing.

"To sur-" his face fell in horror. It couldn't be what he thought it was. She had been doing so much better the previous morning.

"We're going to try to combat the spreading infection. If it's not done now, the infection will kill her. I'll let you know as soon as the surgery is finished," said the doctor as two nurses wheeled Liv out of her room.

He watched them wheel her out, and went to wait in the waiting room. Everyone had left after they talked to her, thinking she was home free. He was debating with himself as to whether or not he should call them. It was late after all, and he would be waking them up, but wouldn't they want to know what was going on? But, then again, would Liv want them to know? She hadn't told them what the doctors were planning when she talked to the others.

He sighed and walked over to the payphone in the corner. He put a few coins from his pocket into the slot. He was really hoping no one would answer.

"Hello?" answered a tired voice. He was obviously a bit annoyed at being called at 2:30 in the morning.

"Chris?" He already knew that he was the one who answered the phone. Chris was the only one he knew who would be able to understand just what he was going through.

"Yeah, who's lookin' for him?" he asked groggily. He was awake in an instant, because he knew it couldn't possibly be a wrong number.

"Chris, it's Elliot. I know it's late, but I needed to call you," he said, hoping he hadn't woken up Alyssa.

"Elliot, what's the matter? What's wrong?" he asked. No one called this early for a good reason.

"It's Liv," he said, trying his best to keep his voice level.

"Oh my god. Are you ok? What happened? How's Liv? Is she ok?" he asked, wondering what the hell happened. Was she dead? He liked Liv, she and Elliot always made him laugh when they were in the same room.

She was his wife's best friend, and someone he grew to believe in. He couldn't help but think of her as a friend. He also knew what Liv meant to Elliot, he knew that they loved each other more than life itself. Even if Alex hadn't mentioned it millions of times, it was clearly obvious to see whenever you saw them together or when you saw them look at each other, or if you heard them talk about each other.

"I'm fine for the most part. As for Liv...Chris, she's not doing so well," he said, leaning against the wall for support. "Liv had been taken prisoner about four weeks ago."

"Elliot, I'm so sorry," he said.

"We're still at the hospital. We found her alive, but almost gone."

"I can come down if you want. I can be there in ten minutes," Chris offered. He was worried for Elliot, and about Liv.

"I-I just...I failed her, Chris. I didn't protect her like I promised. I failed her, because I couldn't keep one simple fucking promise..." he trailed off, not wanting to continue. "I don't know what they did to her. I failed her. I don't know how I can live with myself right now. I could have stopped her. She insisted she go alone, and I never said anything about it. I didn't try to stop her. It's the only promise I've ever broken, and it's caused so much damage. I failed her," he choked out. He couldn't hold it in anymore.

"Elliot...Elliot, listen to me. You didn't fail Olivia. I'm sure she will be fine," he said reassuringly. He knew Elliot took it hard when something happened to Liv, when things didn't go perfectly. He always blamed himself for things that couldn't be helped, simple mishaps. Chris never heard Elliot cry, and it broke his heart to hear him now. He wanted to find someway to comfort him.

"She's in surgery now. They re trying to fight the infection spreading through her body. They're trying everything, but nothing seems to be working. It's made her really sick, and I didn't notice 'till it was almost too late. God, I'm suck a fucking idiot."

Chris stayed quiet for a second, realizing how hurt Liv must really be. Even if this was her only injury and nothing else was wrong, things didn't look good for the Detective.

"I'll be there in ten minutes ok? Let me tell Alex what's going on," he said.

"No, it's ok. I didn't mean to bother you, I just needed someone to talk to was all," said Elliot.

"You might think you don t need support, but I'm coming anyway. Which floor are you on?"

"7th, but this isn't necessary," he started, but Chris had already hung up the phone.

Sighing heavily, Elliot hung up the phone and sat down on the floor under the payphone. He drew his knees to his chest and rested his head on them. There he sat, waiting for the news that Liv was going to be ok. He sat waiting for Chris to get there to comfort him. There he waited for the dawn to come, to wipe away the darkness that both literally and figuratively surrounded him. Elliot Stabler always hated waiting, now more than ever.


	12. Chapter 12

Chapter 12

Elliot sat with his face resting on his knees, trying to imagine a life without Liv. He promised her he'd look out for her, to protect her from anything and everything. He promised to never leave her side, no matter what happened. As far as he knew, she wasn't going to make it out of surgery this time, all because he neglected his duty to protect her. He wasn't some worried husband waiting to see if his wife would come home in one piece. He was her partner, and he made her a promise that he hadn't kept. He stayed slouched over under the payphone station until he felt a gentle hand on his shoulder.

"Elliot?" Chris asked. He knelt down next to him and put a gentle hand on his shoulder.

Elliot lifted his head a bit to smile, but then put it down again. He couldn't help but see a bit of irony. It was only three months ago, when he had been the one comforting Chris while Alex was in the hospital, recovering from a deadly gunshot wound. The pain he had been going thorough was unreal, even for Elliot, who rarely felt pain (you know what I'm talking about. The pain you feel when someone pulled on your heart strings.)

"Thank you," he said, letting a bit of his guard down. "You didn't need to come all the way here. I just needed to get some things out, express some fear and concern, you know?"

"Have you heard anything new?" Chris asked, ignoring Elliot's last comment. No matter how he tried to deny he had everything under control, he couldn't handle everything himself.

"No, no one's come out to tell me anything yet," he said. It was only thirty-five minutes after she went in, but each passing second felt like an eternity.

"She's going to be ok. She's a fighter," Chris said, trying to comfort Elliot.

"I could have saved her. I could have stopped her from going," he said, his voice at barely a whisper as he tortured himself once again with guilt.

"I know feel like you could have, but you've gotta realize none of this was your fault."

"But I could have stopped her. She went by herself, and look where that's landed her. I saw her walk through the doors, and I didn't even try to stop her. I could have done something."

Chris sighed. He knew how badly he was hurting, to not be able to help the one he loved most. Chris knew what he was going through, because he was in the same situation, but to go through this ordeal, not knowing if your loved one would make it out of the operating room alive, must be agonizing beyond belief.

"Did you think she was going to stand by and do nothing? No, she wouldn't do that, she'd too good of a person to do that. She wasn't about to let you go out there alone, she wouldn't want anything to happen to you."

"I-I don t know what you're talking about," said Elliot.

"Elliot, don't be stupid. I know you love her. Hell, your whole fucking squad knows it. And it's not too difficult to see that she loved you back the same way," he said, slightly surprised that he'd never been able to pick that vibe up.

"I have know idea what the hell you're talking about. Olivia would never see me as anything more than her partner, and a friend at most," he said, trying to claim ignorance, even though it wasn't working at all. It wasn't something he wanted advertised all over the unit, only to a select few for that matter.

"Come on man, think about it. Who's the one that's always by her side, and visa versa?" he asked. There were very few times he had seen Elliot without Liv, standing either right at his elbow, or a few steps away.

"I think you know exactly what I'm talking about, but you're unsure of what you're feeling and what she's feeling. Therefore you're scared of commitment," said Chris after a while of Elliot being silent.

Elliot stared at the floor, wondering if he and Olivia could ever be more than just partners. He wanted so badly for their relationship to be more, but he knew it could never be that way.

They sat in silence for a while, taking in each other's company, in the cramped space between the payphone station and a row of chairs. Sometimes, words were simply unnecessary. Actions spoke louder than words, after all like the saying went. Sometimes, the ultimate way to cure a broken heart is in the company of a good friend. He must have dosed off, because the next thing he knew, he was hearing loud footsteps and the sound of footsteps on a tile floor coming closer...


	13. Chapter 13

Chapter 13

In a cold, dark, isolated cell, a woman sat with her hands chained above her head tethering her to the solid stone wall behind her, adding pain to her already broken bleeding body. Her head was hung low, as if she was sleeping, her matted brown hair covering her bloody face. The only contrast in the darkness was her pale ghostly skin under the tattered remains of what had been her SVU jacket. She only moved when she heard movement outside her cell. She strained with the strength she could muster to hear what was going on, not to listen to the pounding in her head. She opened her eyes slightly, but saw nothing but darkness. She didn't think she was going to, but for the first time in her life, Olivia Benson started to panic.

They weren't back, were they? She made damn sure the other wouldn't turn back and follow her. All the suffering and pain she had gone thorough she had endured for the past two weeks would have been in vain. She saw the look in Elliot's eyes, and knew it was a look of fear that she'd never come back. She sighed in pain when she realized the commotion in the cell next to her was over food. She found it very ironic that she was hoping against her rescue.

Her thoughts were interrupted when the door to her cell opened and a bright light flooded the cell, giving her an instant blinding headache. She had become accustomed to the darkness that she had been in for the past two weeks, making it hard for her eyes to adjust.

"So, have you made up your mind yet, Benson? Are you going to hand over the information we want, or are we going to have to beat it out of you?" asked the man who had entered the cell, moving toward her with the light shining on her.

Not bothering to give him the answer he wanted, she ignored him and closed her eyes again. She felt her head tilt up, so that she was face-to-face with the man. She opened one eye slightly, wondering what they would do to her this time, but she didn't care anymore.

"You're just full of surprises aren't you?" he asked, looking at all the bruises and scratches that covered her face. "They say you're a real prize with the men back in New York. Who in their right mind would want to give all that up, just because they're too fucking stubborn to give a little information? As soon as we figure you out, things will be totally different."

She didn't have any time to reply, before a knife was plunged into her leg, up to her knee. She didn't make any noise, just a hiss in pain. Her lack of reaction only angered the man, so he plunged the knife into her thigh and ran it down to her kneecap, staining her dirty blood stained pants black.

"You're a great rag doll, but we both know that's not what we want," he said as his fist knocked out several more of Liv's teeth and splitting her lip open again. The man looked for any sign of weakness, any little peep out of the detective, that he could at least get her to scream. He pulled out the knife and added another slice to her arm.

Liv tensed when she saw the man lunge for her arms. They had already been broken in 12 places the first day she was there, and having them tied above her only made the pain worse. She hoped the man hadn't seen the sudden change, and would stop, but the gods just weren't on her side. She should have known this, because they hardly ever were.

"What's the matter, Detective, you don't like that?" he asked her, mocking her pain. "Well, how about this?" he said with an evil smile as he grabbed her arm and sliced through it up to her shoulder. Liv's screams were music to his ears. He kept his firm grip on her arm, earning another whimper in pain.

"You know it's very easy to stop this. All you have to do is tell me where you're keeping the file. Don't say the feds' office, because we've already looked there. Tell us where it is, and we'll let you go."

"I've already told you, I don't know where that file is," she said, through gritted teeth.

"We've told you to stop the lies. We know you know, so make it easier for the both of us and tell us where it is."

"We both know I'm not going to tell you a damn thing, and there's no way in hell you're ever going to let me go, so spare yourselves the time and kill me already. That's what it's come to isn't it?"

"You'll talk, everyone does eventually. All it takes is finding out how to make a person break, and we get what we want. Besides, you're no use to us dead yet Benson," said the man with the knife. He ripped out of her shoulder and walked out of the cell.

Liv looked up to watch the man leave, happy that he had finally left, but knowing full well that the torture would begin again any minute. She tried to take advantage of the time by closing her eyes, needing sleep, but she was too on edge. Any chance of falling asleep was put down as two more men entered her cell, how wonderful.

"So, is here anything you want to tell us?" asked the first man as they walked in. One of them unchained her hands while the other pinned her to the floor.

"No way in fucking hell am I ever going to tell you anything. I'm very surprised the other guy didn't tell you how totally useless I am," she said, smirking at them, or close to it. She bit her lip in pain when they moved her and prepared herself for what was coming next.

One of the men stretched out Liv's arm, watching as the broken bones moved. He smiled when he heard Liv's yell in pain cut short when the other man kneed her in the chest, splintering her already broken ribs and knocking what air was out of her lungs.

"He told us you don't like cooperating, but we think we can change that," said the man on top of her. He had taken something from his pocket and handed it to the other man. "You might not want to tell us, but we have something that will make you come to your senses."

While one of the men were talking to her, the other took a hammer and a nail from his belt loop. He balanced the nail on the top of her hand and beat it in. An hair-raising scream filled the air as muscle, tendons, and skin parted company as the nail was driven all the way through.

She gritted her teeth as she panted through the pain. Liv turned her head to see blood oozing through the hole in her hand. Holy fucking hell, these guys were nuts, but she knew they were far from being done.

"If you want us to stop, you know what we want," said the man holding her down as the other placed another nail on the top of her hand.  
"Well, since there are no objections..." his sentence was finished with a sickening gush of red blood spattering to the floor.

Liv didn't scream this time. She groaned in pain and bit her lip tight, her bloody face contorted in pain. There was another gush of blood as nail tore through flesh. Blood filled her mouth as more of her teeth parted company with her gums, muffling her cries. By the time the nail had gone through completely, blood had started dripping down her chin and Liv lay unconscious.

"Come on, Benson, is that all you can take?" asked the man holding her down with a laugh as he felt the detective go limp. "Go get some water, she's not done that easily," he ordered.

About two minutes later, Liv sputtered awake after having a bucket of water tossed on her. Coughing up water and blood, she tried to sit up, only to realize that the same man from before was still sitting on her, making it harder to breathe than it already was.

"Didn't think we were going to let you have it that easily did you?" asked the other man, yanking violently on her arm, pulling it from its socket, making the detective yelp in pain. The same man put another nail where her arm and shoulder used to be connected.

Knowing what was coming, Liv bit her already raw bloody lip and closed her eyes, wishing with all her might that they hadn't waken her up for this.

"Oh no, you're going to watch this time," said the man that was still pinning her down, pressing his knees into her already broken ribs, making her eyes water. Liv opened them, but there wasn't any sense in trying to delay what was going to happen.

"One more chance: tell us where the file is," said the other man, holding a nail against her skin.

"Just get it over with," she hissed, the wait making her almost nauseous.

The hammer seemed to move almost in slow motion, but it was too fast for her to brace herself for a bone rattling cry that ripped through her throat. She could see her blood pooling where the hail had gone through, forming another pool on the stone floor.

She was hardly aware that the man on top of her had finally gotten up and slammed the cell door closed, leaving the cell once again shrouded in darkness. Once she was finally able to breathe again, she tried to fall back asleep, finally accepting the fact that she was going to die here like road kill on the side of the road.


	14. Chapter 14

Chapter 14

"Detective Stabler?" asked a voice from up above (no, it's not God.) The voice had caused Elliot and Chris to jump, making Elliot smack his head on the bottom of the payphone station. Instead of the old gray-haired doctor that had taken her into surgery, it was a young man, around his age.

"Yes?" asked Elliot, his voice shaking a bit.

"I was told to give you an update on Ms. Benson."

Elliot's face was emotionless, but then again, so was the doctor s, so it was very hard to figure out what was going on.

"She's out of surgery and she's finally stabilized , but we've moved her to ICU. Her fever rose dangerously during surgery, and the infection has spread even more. We're going to keep 24 hour watch on her."

"What do you mean finally stabilized? Did something go wrong in the OR?" asked Elliot, his eyes full of worry.

"Like I said before, her fever rose dangerously high, her blood pressure fell dangerously low, and her heart stopped a couple times. We have her stable for now, but every passing minute is critical," said the doctor, his hands deep in his pockets.

"When can I see her?" he asked.

"They should be taking her to the ICU and minute now. After they get her settled, I'm sure you can go in to see her. But until then, I'm afraid you'll have to wait in the hall. Floor 11 is where she'll be. Are there any other questions I can answer?" asked the doctor.

"No, thank you very much," said Elliot with a very small smile. He sank into a chair when the doctor turned the corner, worry and relief flooding his body. It was nice to hear she made it, but there was still the risk of each passing minute something could happen.

"You ok, man?" asked Chris, sitting down in the vacant chair next to Elliot, looking at him a bit worried.

"Yeah, I'll be fine. It's just been a long couple weeks," he said before standing up again.

"You want to grab something to eat?" asked Chris.

"I will in a minute, I have to make a quick call first," said Elliot, turning to deposit some change into the payphone. He hesitated at first, because if he didn't so it now, he'd forget, and the rest of his unit would yell at him for not giving them an update.

Ring...Ring...Ring...Ring...Ring...

"Who the fucking hell is it?" asked the annoyed voice of John Munch, along with a couple loud yawns. He could tell it wasn't a good time to wake up Munch, he wasn't a morning person.

"Munch, it's Elliot," he said cautiously, not knowing what Munch's reaction would be.

"Elliot, do you know what time it is? It's 2:30 in the fucking morning. I know I'm not late for work, because Cragen would have busted down my door by now," he said, fighting the urge to throw the phone against the wall.

"That's not why I'm calling," he said with a chuckle.

"What's wrong?" he asked, sitting up in bed. If he wasn't calling about being late for work (again) something was very wrong. With his luck, it was probably something he did (like letting the coffee pot spill over and flood the staff lounge.)

"They took Liv into surgery about three hours ago," he told Munch, his voice shaking a bit to tell Munch he was dead serious.

"She was fine yesterday. She was talking to us and was looking better, what the fuck happened?" asked Munch.

"It was her infection. It's spread all over, and the medical staff can't seem to get it under control. They have her in ICU under 24 hour watch in case something happens. The infection's killing her, Munch. I'm in shock just like you are. I knew she was sick, but I had no idea it was this bad."

Elliot heard the distant click of the ancient coffee pot on the other end, before Munch spoke again. "Holy hell. Why didn't the doctors say anything to us while we were there?"

"Because they wanted to keep all of us calm. They want us to believe she's going to make it. And besides, if anything was bothering her, she wouldn't tell any of us anyway."

"True. Have you told everyone else? Does Cragen know?"

"No, I haven't called anyone else. You're the first to know."

"Is there anything I can do? Do you want us to come up there?" he asked.

"There is something you can do. Let everyone know what's going on, but tell them they done need to come up. Tell them to stay home," said Elliot.

"I can do that."

"She'll be fine, don't worry," said Munch before hanging up.

When he turned around, he saw Cragen and the entire SVU unit (minus Munch who was still in bed.)

"Where's Munch?" asked Cragen as the rest of the squad took seats in the waiting room.

"He's probably on his way here, I told him not to come though," said Elliot, taking a vacant seat next to Fin.

"Well, now what do we do? We can't go see her," said Detective Green, his arms folded across his chest.

"There's only one thing we can do," said Cragen. "We wait..."


	15. Chapter 15

Chapter 15

"How is she?" asked Fin when he stopped by on a coffee break. He sat down next to Elliot and tried hard not to look at how bad Liv was getting with each passing day. It made him sick to think of what she had to go through to be in this condition.

"I think she's getting a bit better. She's got a bit of her old color back and her fever's gone down, so that's good news," he said. Unlike Fin, he couldn't keep his eyes off of her, taking in what his broken promise had caused.

After a moment's silence, Fin asked, "how long do you think it'll take this time before she wakes up?"

"What do you mean?" Elliot asked, his forehead wrinkled in slight confusion.

"Her depression," he said, absentmindedly playing with his badge.

"I didn't think anyone knew about that." It was true. Until now, he thought it was only he and Cragen that knew just how unstable she could really be.

"We all saw it after her mom died. She tried to hide it, but you could tell. You also want to watch how much she drinks. When she's depressed and drunk, she can get, well...you just need to watch her. She told me what happened when she was little, and if I hadn't seen it when her mom died, I wouldn't have believed something like that could happen to someone like her," said Fin.

Elliot was quiet for a while, thinking of what exactly would happen to her, if she recovered from this ordeal. How low would she sink this time? Can they pull her back this time, before something happens?

"I didn't think about that until now. We all just need to keep an eye on her for a while. Even when she says she's ok, we all know it's a bold-faced lie, and that it could cost her life." He looked at her still body, unwilling to believe she would do something that would ultimately cost her everything in the end. She was a damn good liar, but they could see through it.

One of the things that Liv Benson feared most was drowning. It wasn't very surprising when, as a small child, you were thrown into a twelve foot deep pool and expected to make it out in one piece. She didn't like being wet. She knew it was a standard torture method to use when interrogating a prisoner, but now that she was on the other end, she was in full panic mode. She couldn't fight back, even if her hands weren't restrained. Plus, her ability to put up a struggle was fading fast, only because she was hanging onto life by a thread.

She could taste the bleach from the brown-green water. From the outside, it looked like water from a very dirty slimy fish tank, and it tasted like it looked. She shook her head in a futile attempt to get her interrogator to let go, but it didn't work. She didn't care if they killed her or not, nor did she care if they hit her harder, so she might actually have the chance not to wake up, but drowning was one way she refused to end it. They could burn her for all she cared, but to drown took too little effort.

She could feel her hair part company with her scalp as she was pulled up again just long enough for her to take a huge breath before being forced back down again. Her lungs burned from lack of oxygen than she couldn't get. The man holding her down elbowed her in the ribs, making her cry out, but there was no noise, just water that filled her lungs making the panic that burned within her turn to icy numbness.

The man holding her by the hair must have felt her go limp, because he picked her up and threw her to the ground. He wasn't supposed to kill her, just rough her up a bit, make her weaker, but he had strict orders not to kill her, not yet anyway. Judging by the drawn out silence, he had done just that. Thinking on his feet, he kicked her hard in the chest with a chilling crack. Moments later, Liv was coughing up water and blood.

"Do you really want to keep this going, Benson?" asked the man standing over her. "You're weak, and if you keep it up, you'll die within a week. Just give us what we want, and you can get the medical help you clearly need."

"Do you...h-honestly think I-I'm that weak?" asked Liv, still coughing up watery blood. Her eyes burned the way they always did, but they were like embers from a fire, fading fast.

"No, but I know you fear for your life. What do you think we'll do if don't tell us what we want to know? We'd go after your squad, that's what we'd do We d hunt them down and do to them what we've done to you."

"If you're foolish enough to do that, good luck. My squad would never let a lot like you to catch them," said Liv as she tried to sit up, knocking the wind out of her.

"Oh, it can t be that hard. I look forward to that moment. Hearing the screams of your squad while we press burning piano wires to their skin. How much fun that would be," he paused, watching for a sign that Liv was getting angry. "Or that partner of yours. How much fun would it be to cut him apart piece by piece to see what makes him tick."

Now getting visibly worked up, Liv slid up the wall slowly to a standing position, her temper rising.

"Your partner would be a great subject to cut apart and see what makes him tick. Cut him up piece by piece, and take out his beating heart."

"YOU SICK TWISTED MOTHER FUCKING BASTARD!" Liv yelled. For someone in as bad of shape as she was, she could still raise her voice to near thunderous levels. She knew she could just shut up and take it like she had in the past, but she couldn't.

She couldn't pretend not to care when her squad, her friends, hell, the men she considered family were threatened. As the man taunting her grew closer, he head butted her, only to earn a kick in the stomach that made her fall backward and hit her head on the stone floor. Her vision faded once more, and her world went black.

Months later, now safe and warm in a hospital, her world came floating back to her.


	16. Chapter 16

Chapter 16

Elliot had been slouched against the wall outside the ICU all morning. He wasn't allowed in to see her, because she had taken a turn for the worse that night. He stationed himself outside the ICU until he was allowed in to see her. He begged the nurses each hour if he could go in to see her, but they all said the same thing: not until they could get things under control.

He woke with a start when he heard a door creak open.

"Detective Stabler, I would like to talk to you and your squad about Ms. Benson. Could you tell them to meet us in the chapel? There are a few thing we would like to tell them," asked one of the doctors that came out of ICU.

"Yeah, I'll get on that right now," he said, rubbing the sun from his eyes. He pulled out his cell phone and dialed the first person that came to mind.

"Capitan Cragen?"

"Yes, this is him."

"It's Elliot. Listen, can you and the squad meet me here at the hospital? The doctors want to talk to all of us."

"We'll be right over. Elliot, hang in there."

"Will do Capitan," he said, shutting his cell phone, wondering what exactly the doctors wanted to tell them.

He made his way down to the chapel to wait for the others and the doctors (by now, he knew his way around the hospital like the back of his hand. Duh, he's been there for the past month and a half.)

He took a seat in one of the pews. He never had been a religious man, but he bowed his head and was in mid-prayer when the rest of the SVU unit entered the chapel.

"How is she?" asked Munch, taking a seat between Elliot and Fin.

"I don't know, they won't let me in to see her. I've been sitting outside the ICU all night and all morning, but they won't let me in to see her," said Elliot.

Right as Fin was about to say something, the doctors came in. The detectives hushed, so they could hear the update they had been waiting for.

"I'm sorry everyone to call you here on short notice, but this was something that couldn't be done over the phone. Last night, she developed a brain aneurysm that ruptured while we tried to get her blood pressure under control. I'm sorry to tell you this, but she passed away while we were fighting to get things back under control. We will allow you in one at a time to say goodbye."

The chapel went silent. The men were in complete utter shock (well, wouldn't you be also if someone you worked closely with died?) Some sat with their hands folded together, almost in prayer, some sat with their heads in their hands, shaking in disbelief while some had silent tears running down their faces.

Elliot sat and stared up at the altar, tears running down his face. One by one, the men left the chapel to say their goodbyes. As they left, they clasped Elliot on the shoulder, to offer their silent condolences.

Elliot sat alone in the chapel, not wanting to believe she was gone. He pulled the ring box from the inside pocket of his jacket and stared at it for a while. To think, that after she was finally released from this godforsaken place, he was going to marry her, to make her his wife after all these years. That will never happen now. He was too late.

He got up and walked up to the altar, staring into the eyes of the man hanging on the crucifix.

"Why did you let this happen? Why did you let her die? Is this punishment for my sins? Why not take me instead?" asked Elliot, furious tears running down his face again.

"The lord has better plans for her, my boy. He has something planned for her that is beyond this world," said a voice from behind him. It was a priest that had come by the hospital to bless it's inhabitants and to give rights to those who died.

"The lord works in mysterious ways, my son. He does not take people from this world in payment for the sins they commit. He takes them when it is their time, because he has bigger plans for them. It is not your fault, my son, so do not blame yourself," said the priest, smiling.

"Thank you very much father," said Elliot, standing and wiping the tears away. He left the chapel and headed to Liv's room, to say goodbye.

Elliot walked with a heavy heart towards the ICU, the ring box clutched in the hand that was deep in his pocket. He entered the ICU, and headed for Liv's room.

"So, it looks like this is goodbye. To think, after you got out of this god damned place, I was going to ask you to marry me. Now that's never going to happen. Why, Liv? Why didn't you let one of us go with you? If you had, none of this would have happened," he said, looking down into her pale face.

"Elliot, the priest wants to do final rights, best let him do it," said Munch, poking his head inside.

"Good bye, my sweet Olivia. I love you, now and forever," he said, kissing her scared hand.

"My son, if you wish you may stay," said the priest, closing the door behind him.

"I'd like to. Father, can you perform a marriage ceremony right now?" asked Elliot, looking at the priest square in the eyes.

"I can, but it is against church teaching to marry someone to a corpse," said the priest, as he donned his priestly blessing attire (I'm not exactly sure what it's called.)

"I don't care. I want you to marry the two of us, right here, right now," said Elliot, pulling the ring box from his pocket.

"If you insist. We are gathered here this day, to join in holy matrimony, these two people. May the Lord look upon them and bless this marriage in the name of the father, the son, and the holy spirit. Amen," said the priest, laying his hands on both Liv and Elliot. Elliot slipped his ring on Liv's pale finger, tears slipping down his face.

"Now, I must finish final rights, there are many other patients in this hospital that need blessings," said the priest, pulling a bottle of holy water from his inner pocket.

Elliot nodded and back away, not taking his eyes off of Liv.

"Lord, our father in heaven. Receive the child who's life has been taken from this world. Accept her into your arms and welcome her to thine heavenly kingdom. Bless her and watch over her, for she is your beloved child," said the priest, sprinkling holy water up and down Liv's cold body.

"I am sincerely sorry for your lost, my son. May the lord help you through this time of sorrow," said the priest as he gathered his things to leave, clasping Elliot on the shoulder.

"Thank you very much for everything father," said Elliot.

As the priest left, Cragen came in, followed closely by Fin and Munch.

"Elliot, we've got to get going. We need to make plans for the ceremony. Let's get back to the station and get all the arrangements done," said Cragen.

"Right. We still have a lot to do," he said, trying to make his voice stop shaking.

The three men filed out of the room. Elliot went over to the bed and kissed Liv's scared pale forehead.

"I'll be right back, Livia. I promise," he whispered, before leaving the room.


	17. Chapter 17

Chapter 17

"Did you try his cell phone?" asked Cragen, as Munch and Fin entered his office yet again.

"Yeah, we tried his home phone, his cell phone, and his pager. No answer," said Munch.

"Where the hell could he be? He was due in three hours ago," stormed Cragen, as he sat back in his chair.

"Give him a break Capitan, he just lost his partner. He needs a couple days to get over his loss. That's probably why he's not answering his calls," said Fin.

"Still, something doesn't feel right. I want the two of you to go and see just what the hell's going on. Call me if there's any trouble," said Cragen.

Munch and Fin left Cragen's office, grabbed their jackets off the backs of their chairs, and headed out the door.

"You really think something's wrong? Or is it just Elliot trying to pretend he doesn't need support?" asked Fin, as he and Munch got in the car.

"I don't know but if something is wrong, Cragen's going to shit himself," said Munch, as they headed towards Elliot's apartment.

* * *

He stumbled to the bedroom that he and Olivia once shared and went to the chest of drawers. After rummaging through them for a bit, he found what he was looking for. He looked at it for a minute, then held it up to his temple.

"I'll see you soon, my sweet Olivia," he whispered.

Then it was all over...

* * *

"Cross your fingers and hope to fucking god nothing's wrong," said Munch, as he and Fin got out of the car. they walked up the stairs to the first floor and knocked on the door.

"Elliot, open up. It's us, we're all worried about you and we came over to talk," said Munch as he hammered on the door.

"Doesn't he keep a spare key around here someplace?" asked Fin.

"Liv said he keeps it above the door frame," said Munch as he felt around for it.

"Aha!" he exclaimed, as he produced the key.

He put it in the lock and opened the door. The two men entered the dark apartment, weary of what they would hopefully not find.

"Check the back rooms," whispered Munch. Fin nodded and headed towards the back room.

"Munch, we have a situation back here," came Fin's voice.

"What's u-oh my god," said Munch, as he looked down at Elliot's bleeding body.

"Station, this is Detective John Munch. We have a situation. I need a bus now, repeat I need a bus now. Address: 1012 Rose Ave. Apartment number 12." Munch dropped to his knees next to Elliot to feel for a pulse, but there wasn't one. They came too late.

"What the hell was he thinking?" asked Munch, as he got up and stood next to Fin.

"He wanted to be reunited with Liv. He was suffering so much, it took over him in the e-what's in his hand?" asked Fin, suddenly.

"It looks like paper. He was writing a good-bye letter to all of us," said Munch, passing the crumpled paper to Fin.

Not too long after, they heard sirens. They left the back room, unable to look at their dead friend. They stood out on the landing for the paramedics and the rest of the SVU to get there.

The first to arrive on the scene were the paramedics, followed closely by Cragen, Alex, Chris, and Casey.

"What's the news? Did you get a hold of him?" asked Cragen, seeing the two men standing outside.

"We got here, and...um, we were too late," said Fin.

"What the hell do you mean 'too late'? What aren't you telling me?" demanded Cragen.

Before Fin and Munch could say anything, two paramedics wheeled a stretcher out of the apartment and down the stairs. Atop the stretcher was a black body bag.

"My god, he actually did it," Cragen whispered.

* * *

They all sat in silence, as the caskets were brought into the church and sat side by side.

"Friends and family of the departed, we gather here today, not to mourn for our loss, but to rejoice in their life. Let us to remember the fond memories we shared with these two dedicated and loyal detectives. Let us now bow our heads in prayer. Father almighty, bring the souls of your beloved children into your kingdom. Guide them and bless them. Keep them in the safety of your loving care. Amen," said the priest.

"Amen," rumbled the church.

* * *

They were laid to rest in the Queens Cemetery, side by side, just like they were when they were alive.

Little by little, the crowd around the double grave thinned out, leaving only Munch, Fin, and Cragen staring down at the graves.

"Well, it looks like this is goodbye. Take care of each other," said Cragen, as he, Munch and Fin turned to walk away.

Elliot Christopher Stabler Olivia Elizabeth Benson

A fierce friend A great friend

A loyal Detective A loyal Detective

A brother A little sister

Rest in peace Rest In Peace


End file.
